Saturday, September 20, 2014
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Brule-isms
My friends, my faithful followers, I am so sorry to have left you. My life has been pretty hectic lately, but I am back. And I promise I will never abandon you again (until something else major comes up)
So most of you are probably questioning what the title of this post means. For those of you who have never heard of Dr. Steve Brule, he is a character played by John C. Reilly. Here's a link to a youtube clip of him (and I would highly recommend watching many more of his videos, as they are hilarious).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02iIN4n4y0A
So over the past few months, I have seen my father begin a slow but steady transformation into a Steve Brule-esque person. For the life of him, he cannot pronounce names. He calls a girl named Amalie Amelia. He constantly adds or subtracts letters to people's names. It's quite strange. The best example of this, though, happened on a trip I took to Seattle. We were at a Mariners game, and my dad asked my brother a question about one of the players. The real name of the athlete in question is Chris Denorfia, but my dad asked my brother about the batting average of "Chris Denozrio" which is just...
To be fair, Denorfia is not a common name, but Denozrio? This is his favorite team for God's sake. What made it better (or worse) was that it took him, three or so tries to get it right. This is direct Brule name butchering. Now I love the man and respect his intelligence, but seriously Dad? Steve Brule is not a role model by any stretch of the word, and it is very strange to see my father transforming into him.
So most of you are probably questioning what the title of this post means. For those of you who have never heard of Dr. Steve Brule, he is a character played by John C. Reilly. Here's a link to a youtube clip of him (and I would highly recommend watching many more of his videos, as they are hilarious).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02iIN4n4y0A
So over the past few months, I have seen my father begin a slow but steady transformation into a Steve Brule-esque person. For the life of him, he cannot pronounce names. He calls a girl named Amalie Amelia. He constantly adds or subtracts letters to people's names. It's quite strange. The best example of this, though, happened on a trip I took to Seattle. We were at a Mariners game, and my dad asked my brother a question about one of the players. The real name of the athlete in question is Chris Denorfia, but my dad asked my brother about the batting average of "Chris Denozrio" which is just...
To be fair, Denorfia is not a common name, but Denozrio? This is his favorite team for God's sake. What made it better (or worse) was that it took him, three or so tries to get it right. This is direct Brule name butchering. Now I love the man and respect his intelligence, but seriously Dad? Steve Brule is not a role model by any stretch of the word, and it is very strange to see my father transforming into him.
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
My Beef with Vegans
Ok, to start, I am going to address any vegans who are reading this. If you are a vegan, I do not automatically dislike you. This is just my experience with certain people who happened to be vegan and a theory that came about because of them.
So this theory: Omnivores make better friends than vegans (and again, this doesn't apply to all vegans. I'm sure some vegans make awesome friends). Now, I'm not saying this because I'm judgmental, it just happened. Now, I think that there is a correlation between these two things.
Here's why. I think that being vegan makes people more closed minded (to clarify one more time, this doesn't apply to all vegans. I'm sure that the vegans who read this blog are very open minded). But I believe that when you make the switch to Vegan you close your mind to new opportunities and different things. All you eat is plants and shit. Vegans... WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR PROTEIN!?!?!? Sorry about that, I'm just confused about that one thing.
Back to the topic at hand, this is not to say that it is a process that cannot be undone. Vegans can be open minded, and even closed minded vegans can become more open minded. But I'm really into open-mindedness. That's the point of this rant. I just wanted to say that it bothers me when people are closed minded, whether it's about food or about people or about anything really.
If you have anything you want to say about this rant, please post your thoughts in the comments below. Thanks for your time, I think you guys are awesome.
So this theory: Omnivores make better friends than vegans (and again, this doesn't apply to all vegans. I'm sure some vegans make awesome friends). Now, I'm not saying this because I'm judgmental, it just happened. Now, I think that there is a correlation between these two things.
Here's why. I think that being vegan makes people more closed minded (to clarify one more time, this doesn't apply to all vegans. I'm sure that the vegans who read this blog are very open minded). But I believe that when you make the switch to Vegan you close your mind to new opportunities and different things. All you eat is plants and shit. Vegans... WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR PROTEIN!?!?!? Sorry about that, I'm just confused about that one thing.
Back to the topic at hand, this is not to say that it is a process that cannot be undone. Vegans can be open minded, and even closed minded vegans can become more open minded. But I'm really into open-mindedness. That's the point of this rant. I just wanted to say that it bothers me when people are closed minded, whether it's about food or about people or about anything really.
If you have anything you want to say about this rant, please post your thoughts in the comments below. Thanks for your time, I think you guys are awesome.
Support
A friend of mine started a youtube channel. It's a vlog. And because I know it's hard to get a blog off the ground I figured I'd give her some support (not that I have the fanbase to make a huge difference, but anything helps). So I'll put a link to her channel. It's not half bad, but she needs a tripod or something. Subscribe if you enjoy it, and keep coming back to my blog if you don't.
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfbhqnfLjzSU-rxwKv5uE8g
Thanks guys
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfbhqnfLjzSU-rxwKv5uE8g
Thanks guys
Monday, August 11, 2014
Monday
It's Monday, and for me that means it's pun-day. So here'a s couple puns to make the hardest day of the week a little easier.
My doctor told me that I had type A blood, but it was a type-o.
If you jumped into a river in France, you'd be in-seine.
That's all for today. I hope you laughed. If you have any puns you'd like to share, go ahead and post them in the comments.
My doctor told me that I had type A blood, but it was a type-o.
If you jumped into a river in France, you'd be in-seine.
That's all for today. I hope you laughed. If you have any puns you'd like to share, go ahead and post them in the comments.
Sunday, August 10, 2014
Inside Jokes
I want to talk about inside jokes. They are either a constant source of joy, or the worst thing in the world. When you have an inside joke, it's fantastic and whenever something reminds you of it you have to stifle laughter. For example, if my friend Brice or I ever say the phrase "glub glub" we'll start laughing. But for anyone outside of that, you'll just be annoyed because you don't know what it means. It's terrible.
I remember one time I was hanging out with two of my friends, and they had one of those moments where they shared an inside joke. I wasn't there when it was created, and therefore I did not understand the humor of the situation. I felt soooooooooo left out (seeing as how I still think about it, I obviously still bear the scars). So yes, I do know what it feels like to be on the other side of it.
A friend of mine once said to me "friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth." I am aware that he did not create this saying, but I did appreciate him saying this to me. Well, inside jokes are the embodiment of this sentiment. And yes, I know if you see someone peeing their pants in public you're probably going to have some judgmental thoughts. But that's wrong because they may have more going on than meets the eye. And inside jokes? You can't judge people for having them because you know for a fact that you have them too.
I was jealous of my friends for having inside jokes without including me for so long. How dare my friends have friends other than me!? But then I made an inside joke around someone who wasn't involved and I saw the light. Friendship without inside jokes is like a book without characters. Nobody wants to be a part of that. It's integral to the structure of the entity. And part of what makes inside jokes so special is that it's a bond that is shared by only two people in the ENTIRE WORLD. That's huge. So next time you feel left out of an inside joke, just remember that you're witnessing something incredibly special and unique, and that you really shouldn't be jealous of other people being happy. Thanks for reading until the end. I appreciate your company, and anything you have to say is welcome.
I remember one time I was hanging out with two of my friends, and they had one of those moments where they shared an inside joke. I wasn't there when it was created, and therefore I did not understand the humor of the situation. I felt soooooooooo left out (seeing as how I still think about it, I obviously still bear the scars). So yes, I do know what it feels like to be on the other side of it.
A friend of mine once said to me "friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth." I am aware that he did not create this saying, but I did appreciate him saying this to me. Well, inside jokes are the embodiment of this sentiment. And yes, I know if you see someone peeing their pants in public you're probably going to have some judgmental thoughts. But that's wrong because they may have more going on than meets the eye. And inside jokes? You can't judge people for having them because you know for a fact that you have them too.
I was jealous of my friends for having inside jokes without including me for so long. How dare my friends have friends other than me!? But then I made an inside joke around someone who wasn't involved and I saw the light. Friendship without inside jokes is like a book without characters. Nobody wants to be a part of that. It's integral to the structure of the entity. And part of what makes inside jokes so special is that it's a bond that is shared by only two people in the ENTIRE WORLD. That's huge. So next time you feel left out of an inside joke, just remember that you're witnessing something incredibly special and unique, and that you really shouldn't be jealous of other people being happy. Thanks for reading until the end. I appreciate your company, and anything you have to say is welcome.
Pilot
I officially have a blog. Whether that is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen. Seeing as how this is my first post, I thought that I would open with a welcome statement. If you happen to be reading this, I think you're awesome. Seriously, I thank you for taking the time to read this. As the title of my blog suggests, I'm going to be posting puns here. If I see, hear, or create a pun that I like, I have a new post. Other that that, I'm going to put my thoughts about life in general on here. Hopefully it's as entertaining as I think it is. This post is boring, I know, but nothing is good at the point when it starts. I promise, it'll only get better from here. Oh, and if you have something to say, please comment. I'd love to hear what other people are thinking too.
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